A Past Life Regression with Barbara Burgess (October 30, 2012)

My first impression is of wearing sandals

I’m wearing something loose-fitting, like a drape. Toga-like with a belt waist band

Anything on your head? (long hesitation) a kind of crown: a metallic head-dress interchanging (flip-flopping) with a laurel wreath

Are you holding anything? “A wooden, elaborately carved rod in my right hand. It has a decorative top to it like an encased ruby … a deep red stone … encased in a wooden nest. Finely carved but smooth to the touch. It looks and feels like some kind of staff of office. In my left hand I have a rolled scroll.”
Are you indoors or outside? “I’m standing outdoors at the top of a grand stone staircase with pillars either side. I’m alone but there are military people on either side and behind me, fairly close by. They are all standing erect with what look like spears in their grasp, resting on the floor. I feel no threat, but a sense of camaraderie. There are other people standing behind me.”

Are you surrounded by friends? “Yes, I think so.”

Are there people at the bottom of the staircase? “Yes, I’m about to make a proclamation to people gathering in a public area at the bottom of the steps. We’re all waiting for the appointed moment for the proclamation to be made.”

Do you have any idea what that moment is? (I gave no answer, but then I said) “The proclamation has some kind of military connotation.”

About how old are you? “The number 32 came into my head. Yes, early 30s. I feel it’s a similar age to most of those around me.”

“The weather is calm, warm … a clear blue sky.”

How are you feeling? “Also calm. I feel I’ve done this kind of thing many times before.”

“The pronouncement is about the appointment of a new general: a decision arrived at by me in collaboration with the group of people behind me.”

Quite an important group of people? “Yes, clearly. I’ve now unfurled the scroll and stepped forward to address the public. I’m trying to see the name on the scroll … the name of the newly appointed general. It’s in Latin and it looks like C.R.V.C.I.V.S. (Crucius). My announcement seems to have been greeted with enthusiasm from the people gathered in the forum. I have to say ‘the Senators behind me are echoing the enthusiasm of the people, and congratulating themselves as well.’ The popularity of the appointment of Crucius was not a forgone conclusion, but I have now announced he has been assigned to a campaign in Gaul and is to make his way there without delay, with a large contingent of legionnaires and supplies. The people disperse and I turn to join the group of Senators. We retire to the great hall to take refreshment, and the centurion body guard takes-up new positions.”

What colour is your toga? “Predominantly white with a striking double purple edge. The outer (broad) edge has a narrow, inner purple line running parallel to it. All of those (15-20 others) who were gathered behind me were dressed similarly, and most of them had purple edging to their togas. Those that didn’t (4 or 5 of them) had a reddish coloured edging to their togas. I appear to be the only one wearing a toga with a double purple edge. I guess that denotes some degree of seniority.”

Do you know your name? “I’m trying to reject it because it’s such a well-known name, and one I don’t feel particularly happy with … Nero. I’m trying to work-out if it’s something similar to Nero but with a different sound.”

At this point Barbara said not to worry, as she wanted me to move-on.

After counting 1-2-3 she asked me Where are you now? After some delay, I said, “I’m a long, long way from Rome. It’s somewhere in what we now call Europe … Gaul. It’s dusk, and I’ve come to support Crucius and his army who have been caught-up in some battles. Crucius sent a messenger to me calling for help and, in great haste, I put together a large contingent and marched north to support him. I’m now dressed in military garments, quite heavy duty stuff, including a hefty helmet with a large red adornment at the top. Crucius and I are standing in a tent in candle light with some of Crucius’ junior officers and we’re studying what looks like a map. They all seem to be deferring to me, but I’m trying to encourage them to make their own observations as to how we might bring the local and troublesome tribal elements under control.”

You seem to have had a lot of experience at this sort of thing? “Yes, it would appear so. I’ve earned my senator’s toga through military campaigns stretching back quite a few years, although I’m only 32 … no, I’m not … I’m now 35. Clearly, my earlier campaigns have been successful, yet I still feel ready and willing to come to the aid of a friend and his endangered garrison.”

At this point Barbara asked if anything else was happening? I said no, so she counted 1-2-3 again
Is it day or night? “It’s very early morning, the grey light of dawn. Crucius and are on horseback leading a column of men on the march towards a trouble spot. Scouts were sent out earlier, but they haven’t returned. I’ve halted the column and ordered the forming of a defensive formation. We’re in a gulley in a wooded area on a well-worn pathway. I’ve sent out detachments into both sides of the wood and I’m following one of them. Suddenly five members of the scouting detachment sent-out earlier appear with three prisoners. They’ve been discovered hiding in readiness for an ambush. I call for an interpreter and send them to the rear of the column for interrogation.”

Note: A lot more military manoeuvring takes place under my and Crucius’ direction over the next few minutes, and our plans succeed. As ordered, the legionnaire detachments surprise the main group of hostiles with a pincer movement and return to Crucius and me with yet more prisoners. Before they set-out I had insisted I didn’t want a blood bath and my soldiers followed those orders to the letter. The new prisoners were, likewise, sent to the rear for interrogation, after which they would be taken to Rome and sold as slaves. That evening, Crucius and I spent time among the prisoners and we discovered a chieftain had been captured. We questioned him via our interpreter and, in the end, he agreed he should accompany Crucius and me to a meeting of the other elders in his village. That visit is successful and results in a peace pact. Crucius and I celebrate that evening in my tent “toasting each other with quite a big jar of wine and some fruit”. The following morning I receive a request to return to Rome without delay.

Barbara takes us to the next phase … 1-2-3

What’s happening now? “I’m back in Rome and it’s rather troublesome. While I was away a conspiracy against the emperor was uncovered. I’ve been warned by some of my colleagues that I’ve been implicated in the conspiracy. But how could I have been involved in a conspiracy while I was hundreds of miles away? I know nothing of it.”

Note: at this point I referred to the emperor by name as “Nero”. And I added “he’s started a witch hunt … he’s a madman … and one whose name I share”.

Are you frightened? My (chuckling) reply is, “Yeah … knowing Nero, one has every reason to be frightened. I’m being advised by my aids to make myself scarce, but I tell them there are things to do here in Rome and I’m confident of being able to persuade Nero I have nothing to do with the conspiracy. I’m going to try and reason with him and his appointed judges. Hopefully I will be able to convince them that I’m as shocked as they are about the conspiracy.”

Moving forward in time, how did that go? “Badly … badly. I’m in a cell with others.”

Do you know those others? “I know some of the faces and I know some of the names, but I don’t know that I could point to any of them and say ‘here’s somebody I know very well’. They’re all vague acquaintances.

What’s happening in that cell? “It’s a pretty filthy place to be. There’s not a lot anyone can do in these circumstances but sit and ponder … and wonder why.”

Have they decided that you’re guilty? “I don’t think any of us have been tried yet. As far as I can make-out there has been no attempt to uncover the conspiracy either in public or private. A group of people – me included – have been rounded-up on flimsy evidence. Quite what’s going to happen to us I don’t know. Nero is paranoid … he’s mad. For all his poetry, his singing, his dancing, he’s not a nice person and one has to bear that in mind. It doesn’t look good for any of us in this cell.”

Are you fearful for your life? “Yes”

Is there anyone you’re thinking of? “My wife who I’ve seen so little of over the past few years. It’s at moments like this I realise how much I’ve missed her company.”

Is there anything else happening? “This cell is a very troubled place. I can hear movement outside and, along with most of us in the cell, I’m beginning to back-off and fear for my life. Sure enough … the doors of the cell have been flung open and there are a bunch of scruffy looking mercenaries facing us. They’ve all got swords and daggers. We’ve got nothing. What does one do in such circumstances?”
Do you put-up a fight? “Most of those in the cell are looking at me for some kind of guidance. The only thing I can do … I think I can see the ring leader of the group and I’ve rushed him in a desperate attempt to disarm him, but I’ve failed. He’s skewered me in the belly with his sword and swiftly stabbed me in the neck with his dagger. I’m still struggling with him, but I realise my life is ebbing away, my strength is going. I’ve got my hands around his throat but I can’t bring any pressure to bear with my fingers. He’s sort of smiling at me as if to say, “Go on try it … you haven’t got the strength”. And with that, he thrust his dagger in my neck again and now everything has gone black.”

Was that the moment you breathed your last breath? “Yes”

What was the last thought in your mind as you breathed your last breath? “I feel as if I’m smiling. So this is what death is all about? And I’m feeling a great weight being lifted off my shoulders. All the responsibility I’ve had has been released and, in its place, there’s a sense of freedom”

And as you breathe your last breath and your soul leaves your body for the last time, do you stay with your body, or do you leave immediately? “Strangely, I feel I am in one of the tightest corners of the cell, looking down on what’s happening. I recognise my own body. I tried to defend myself … and my innocence. But what can you do against an armed rabble? All of the other prisoners have been dispatched. In fact I sense that one or two of them are with me here in this tight little corner of the cell and we’re looking down at the rabble wiping their swords and daggers, cleaning them of the innocent blood they’ve just shed.”

Do you stay there with the bodies for long or do you move on? “No, I’ve just thought, I don’t want to be here anymore, and I’m not. I’m out in a cornfield … a beautiful place. I’ve just seen a tree in the distance and thought, what a beautiful tree. I must take a closer look at it. And there I was in an instant! I’m now sitting under that tree. I know I’ve died. I know I’ve moved from that physical existence into a completely different sphere. This is the afterlife they spoke of … our priests told us about. And it’s not bad.”

Do you stay on the earth plain for long, or do you move into the light? “In fact, as I sat under the tree I looked into the distance towards the horizon. The sun was quite high in the sky, but the brightness of that horizon was unimaginable. I just had to go and investigate and I found myself on a little green hill, looking a bridge over a brook. And I could see some people over the other side of the bridge. First among them, I recognised my mother, and standing beside her, my father and my grandparents each side of them. And my little sister who died at the age of six. So many other faces I remember from my earlier years … relatives, friends … they’re all smiling, waving, beckoning.”

“I’m crossing over the bridge, and I’ve reached the other side. They all surge forward, my mother first. It’s such a happy reunion. I haven’t got enough length in my arms to embrace them all at once, so I embrace them two at a time. But I keep hold of my Mum. This is such a joyous experience. It is much, much more than the priests told us it would be like. Such happiness. I just can’t find the words to express.”

Before you bid farewell to the life you’ve just left, is there anyone from that life you’d like to leave a message for? Crucius for example? Something you never had a chance to say to him? “My memory is not that good and I may have said this to Crucius during our campaigning together, but I must say to him ‘thank you for you comradeship’. Comradeship like that is so important, not only in a military sense, but in a humanitarian sense too. That two grown men can bond with each other like brothers, yet not be brothers is remarkable. We didn’t have much in common. We didn’t look anything like each other. He was quite short and tubby. I was a lot taller than him and (dare I say it) more muscular. But, then, I’d probably had more opportunity to properly exercise my body over the years than he had. We were like chalk and cheese in many ways, but when it came to matters military, we were blood brothers.”

Note: Under Barbara’s guidance, I then moved forward several years to rejoice over the way I had still been able to ‘join’ Crucius mind-to-mind on some of his military exploits and even get subliminal impressions of what action to take, through to him, when he was in tricky situations on the battlefield. “These moments took our relationship onto a different level. They were invaluable experiences for me … him still in his body, me out of mine. But we were still working together. That’s good. I promise myself, I will be near or at the front of those waiting to greet him when it’s his turn to cross over that bridge.”

Now, the rabble who broke into the cell and killed you. Is there anything you’d like to say to them? “I understand their actions. I forgive them. They were as afraid for their lives as I was for mine, but they had the advantage of weapons. They were asked to do a job at pain of death, and they did it. I understand what they did and why they did it, and I forgive them.”

Is there anyone else you’d like to talk to from that life? “Yes, my wife Lucrecia. I know I had to spend a lot of time away from you, but that never diminished my love for you. Not one jot.”

I would now like your spirit guide to come in to review the life you’ve just left … “Life is one battle after another. One campaign after another, but to succeed in life you must take responsibility for your actions. There is a purpose to every event in your life: good, bad or indifferent. And from that life’s perspective, what I’m saying is ‘you rose to quite a lofty height but, unlike many others, the power you had didn’t corrupt you.’ Most important of all, you remained true to yourself. These are all major objectives in life … take responsible for your actions, don’t allow power to corrupt and, above all, remain true to yourself.”

Can the spirit guide tell you what connection he has to your current life? “There is no connection. Not with this particular incarnation. He’s telling me there are other incarnations that have a direct connection with my present incarnation.”

Is there some reason you were shown this particular incarnation? “He’s just said to me … ‘it just proves it’s not all bad’ (Barbara laughed). And he’s corrected himself. ‘Come to think of it, there is a connection … when the chips are down, you’re a good tactician.’

Does your guide have a name? “Name, hmmm … I’m questioning it, and he’s said … ‘look, it sounds the same, but it’s spelt differently … it’s Zenn … Z.E.N.N.’”

Before we leave the spirit realm is there anything else Zenn would like to say to you? “He’s just repeated, ‘be true to yourself.’” Barbara then asked me to remain in that lovely place for a short while longer, then slowly brought me back into full consciousness.

(Thank you, David, for sharing this with me.)