Let’s face it, I’m scared;
Although I know I could have fared
Better the first time if I’d been
With someone as loving as you:
But the trepidation, that’s unseen
By your eyes, is all that I can view.
What’s caused me to be afraid?
They say it’s the bed that I made:
Obviously, I felt unable to lie
In it, so I began to run,
Wishing I could die,
Neglecting my son.
Was this what I wanted in my life?
Frankly, no, considering other’s plight.
I just wanted to be loved as I was to be
Later in the arms of a lover or three.
But, in the meantime, I took to flight
To escape the angry clutches of my wife.
What had I won?
Nothing with which to try
To have a little bit of fun,
While trying not to cry
About the big, fat goose-egg I’d laid
Of my life, knowing I’d be repaid.
Every word I say is true:
I’m not saying this just to be mean;
I want to attempt a union, new,
But I don’t want it to become something obscene;
I may try it yet, if I’m not dared:
But let’s face facts, I’m still scared.
(written in 1978)